(RVBirds of a Feather, climbs up on his opinionated soapbox)
Envy can become an all consuming emotion. Trust me, I know. Yes, I have experienced it once. (OK, maybe more than once. Alright then, many times! Happy now?)
The heart of envy, is a longing for what others have. This can, and often does, easily lead to bad internal feelings that completely immerses one in what is perceived to be wrong with one's own life.
In my opinion, envy causes one to focus on what one doesn't have, when comparing with what one has. In other words, I find I am holding in my mind, a feeling of lacking. At the very least, it causes feelings of anger, depression, or sadness that life is not treating me fairly.
Some may argue that feeling envious can increase your motivation to get what you want (as in keeping up with the Joneses). Just look at all the corporate ladder climbers out there. So focused on the money and power further up the line, they are willing to do whatever it takes to move up. And I wonder if for those that do make it to the top, they can really enjoy their successes, or if, this envious motivation that got them there, still dominates their feelings. (Never enough, I want more)
But in my opinion, it can be so all consuming, it prevents one from being able to step back, appreciate what one already has. It is difficult to find happiness in your surroundings when this emotion dominates your feelings.
How much better my life would be, if only I had what I see others have. More money, fame, material things, if only I could possess these things. Sigh...
Recently, I have been trying to make a concerted effort when this god forsaken emotion rears it's ugly head, to step back, re-consider all that I do have. Appreciate more the good fortunes that have been bestowed on me.
And it is not that hard to do. When I do this, these envious feelings just seem to fade away, and I feel better and happier about my life, at least for that moment.
Change one's focus. That's it! The more grateful rather than envious I feel, the happier I am. Hey this is not rocket science here! Just give it a try, the next time you are feeling...envy.
And then there are those, that go out of their way, to try and invoke envy in you. You know the type, always talking about there successes, or working into the conversation all of the possessions they own, in hope that you will feel and show your envy. It seems to me, these types are suffering from low self esteem. They need to see your envious response in order to satisfy their own low self esteem issues.
Don't you hate it when this happens? And more importantly, don't you hate it when you get sucked into feeling the emotions they are trying to illicit.
It is so manipulative.
But having said all of this, of course, this never happens to you, right?
So why does it happen to me?
Gees, I am so green with envy, of you...
(RVBirds of a Feather, finally climbs down off the soapbox)